Monday, April 26, 2010

Incompatible?

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Recently I updated my computer’s operating system, only to result in my printer not working. Come to find out the printer company had not written new drivers to coincide with the release of this new operating system. I discovered this after researching computer forums (fun stuff), several tech support calls (my most favorite thing), buying a new printer that was compatible (supposedly), returning that printer, doing more research, and finally getting a printer that works splendidly.

BTW, I am the IT guy in my house. The hours are long and the pay not so good.

Technology is such a time saver, until it doesn’t work. The reality is that in a time of diversity and rapid change, incompatibility is standard fare.

In our current series in the Book of Esther I’ve been reminded of this reality in following Jesus. Jesus was incompatible with 2 groups of people – the people who thought He was taking this God thing a bit too far, and the religious folks who thought He should join them in being mean.

It seems we get to engage in the same struggle… The Bible clearly points to this.

Peter said Of course, your former friends are surprised when you no longer plunge into the flood of wild and destructive things they do. So they slander you.” 1 Peter 4:4 NLT

Paul saidThe Message that points to Christ on the Cross seems like sheer silliness to those hellbent on destruction, but for those on the way of salvation it makes perfect sense. This is the way God works, and most powerfully as it turns out.” 1 Corinthians 1:18 Message

On the other hand Paul said “Now accept the one who is weak in faith, but not for the purpose of passing judgment on his opinions.” Romans 14:1 NASB

And Jesus said (the Message Version paraphrase) "Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults--unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging.” Matthew 7:1-2 Message

It seems to me that the challenge is to live in the radical middle: so in love with Jesus that people accuse you of being foolish, and so in love with people that others accuse you of being too accepting.

Living in the radical middle means you will be incompatible with those content to live a life lacking in love (for whatever reason). The drivers just won’t work.

However, Jesus understands and is able to resolve the hardest of situations. He did that with me, as I originally believed loving God shouldn’t go too far…

At the very least (and most important) He gives a peace which surpasses our understanding and helps us endure incompatibility.

So the next time I find myself in a similar conflict, I purpose to keep moving toward the radical middle. I want to let my love for God and my love for people grow to uncomfortable depths.

And I will keep praying that everyone updates their software to work with MAC.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Uncertainty

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It was 1988, and we just found out “we” were pregnant. We’d been married for 6 years and had a four-year-old son. The timing just didn’t seem ideal…

I was in the middle of a “God, what are you doing in my life?” season. I was agitated, frustrated, filled with self-doubt, afraid of making a wrong decision, feeling pressed from every side. You know, one of those times everything looks okay outwardly but inwardly you feel like you're sinking?

I had been in my job for a few years - counseling, pastoring, training lay people to counsel, learning the ropes in ministry… I was getting acclimated with bizarre as the standard fare.

I was fresh out of seminary where we were taught to “integrate” psychology and theology. I had 3 counselees who were satanic ritual abuse victims, and several others in serious condition. They weren’t much in need of what I had written about integration, but were desperate for some relief and healing.

There was some progress in people’s lives, which was very gratifying, but at the same time I had this nagging sense something wasn’t right. It wasn’t what I was doing that was wrong, it was that God was preparing me for new orders (little did I know).

I learned that God uses the air of uncertainty to draw us into a place of readiness to hear His call. It is amazing how disarray precedes order.

Most of the time it has meant staying put and reordering us internally.

But this time was different...

With the mounting internal struggle, June and I began to pray daily for God to show us His will, "Was I missing something?" I felt like the young eaglet being taught to fly by the mother bringing back thorns to the nest.

So we started the process of exploring other options for a ministry position. Then June got pregnant. If we were to change positions we would lose our insurance and surely God wouldn’t want us to do something that could put us in a place of risk or cost us financially.?

But as we stepped forward everything came together. A new position opened miraculously. We were able to transition rather smoothly.

We got on the “We have no insurance baby plan” - a flat rate of $1,700 at Rose Hospital for prenatal care and birth ($10 a diaper at the hospital not included).

We were freaked out but excited. Everything went surprisingly well and we had a new beautiful blond-haired blue-eyed boy (recessive gene thing).

Our small group leadership team shocked us by collecting a special offering that paid for the birth of our son. Wow. At every turn God provided.

After 3 years we were launched again back into the area of Aurora we had left. Everything that hadn’t made sense about the timing and our struggles now made sense.

Sometimes we’ve navigated uncertainty pretty well. Other times, we’ve done more freaking out… But God has always been faithful. All three of our sons were born in a time of uncertainty, and coincided with great blessing. And every season of uncertainty has brought a strengthening of what matters most.

We don't plan on having any more babies, but we do plan on trusting the Lord with all our heart, not leaning on our own understanding, but in all our ways acknowledging Him, knowing He WILL direct our paths.